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laniew1So this is kind of based off a thread in softlyforgotten’s journal where a long discussion was had about Ryan Ross maybe making amateur porn and Brendon finding out about it.
This is so very NC-17 because apparently Ryan Ross porn star makes the sex happen.
Part 1 of 3.
RATING: NC-17
PAIRING: Ryan/OC, pre-Ryan/Brendon
AUTHOR: Melanie
SUMMARY: He doesn’t even want to know how Ashlee found it, he’s pretty sure it involves Pete in some way.
DISCLAIMER: I don’t own any of these boys and I’m pretty sure that this has never happened.
Speak To Me of Friends and Lovers 1/3
Ashlee is the one that sends him the link. Later he’ll think that he doesn’t even want to know how Ashlee found it, he’s pretty sure it involves Pete and he just can’t go there. For now there’s a ‘wtf’ comment in her e-mail and that alone is enough to force Brendon to watch it.
He clicks the play button and he has the sound turned off because he’s scared the dogs with some of the ones that Ash has a habit of forwarding to him.
He watches for a second, peering at the screen, the picture is sort of dark and out of focus, then suddenly bright and in focus, like whoever was operating the camera realized that they were operating the camera
It takes a moment of blinking at the screen, the camera-person is really focused on the guys dick and Brendon is really focused on it too; it’s a nice one. All long and thick and he’s half-wondering why Ashlee is forwarding him pornotube porn and half-wondering if he’s watching too much porn because the cock framed in the screen looks really familiar.
He’s just decided that there is no such thing as too much porn and the dick is just nice enough to be memorable when the camera jerks up to the face belonging to the really nice cock and Brendon clicks the pause button like he’s having a seizure.
Ryan’s face freezes there, Brendon blinks at the screen and he folds his hands together in his lap and doesn’t click the play button. Ryan’s looking directly at Brendon like he can see him through the laptop screen and time and knows that Brendon is thinking about watching porn starring Ryan Ross.
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He doesn’t watch it, not right away anyway. He minimizes the screen and he goes to feed the dogs and wait for Spencer to come home.
He can’t watch porn with someone wearing Ryan’s face in it; it takes him the hour waiting for Spencer to convince himself of that.
This is just someone that looks like Ryan, because when would Ryan have had time to make porn with the touring and the recording of the first record and, it just wouldn’t have been physically possible.
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The resolution to not watch Ryan Ross doppelganger porn lasts until he’s alone in his room.
Then he locks his door, something he doesn’t normally do unless he’s jerking off and he doesn’t bring the laptop onto the bed with him. Instead he sits in his desk chair, fully clothed and plugs his headphones in because the last thing he needs is for Spencer to hear him listening to the porn.
He maximizes the screen and it’s been long enough that the screen has reset, he clicks the play button and folds his hands together in his lap.
It starts the same, dark and out of focus, then suddenly there is light and the camera is focused and the dick is there again.
The camera makes the same jerky motion and he unlinks his hands long enough to turn the volume up.
“Come on then,” the camera man is saying, he sounds young and unfamiliar.
“You’re a dick,” and Brendon jerks, hands clenching tightly. It doesn’t mean anything that the look-alike Ryan sounds exactly like Ryan. It doesn’t, he might be mimicking him, except the monotone and low, bored voice is really hard to mimic.
“This was your idea, baby,” the camera man says, he sounds amused.
“This wasn’t quite what I had in mind,” the look-alike says, one of his hands moves into frame and strokes down his cock. Long fingers, long familiar fingers. Brendon has watched those fingers play guitars and pluck out simple songs on a piano.
That’s Ryan there, hand wrapping around his dick, not a look-alike or anyone else.
Just Ryan, jerking off for an unseen camera man and however many people had watched this on pornotube.
Brendon kind of wants to gouge all their eyes out. Nobody gets to see Ryan like this, Brendon doesn’t even get to see Ryan like this, all loose limbed, fingers wrapped around his cock…
He’s breathing heavy, just like Ryan on that bed that Brendon doesn’t recognize, the camera is completely focused on his cock and his hand and the sound of Ryan panting and moaning in his ears is almost more then he can take. He wants to touch himself, wants to stroke himself off like Ryan is, wants to…
Ryan’s back arches, the camera zooms out and moves and suddenly there’s another hand wrapping around Ryan’s as he comes, a long drawn out, “fuck” breathed out through bitten red lips.
Brendon snarls at the hand touching Ryan’s, when Ryan slumps, breathing shallowly his hand falls to his side.
The other hand, the interlopers hand trails through the splatter of come on Ryan’s belly.
The screen goes dark, the video ending and links to other, similar videos that he might be interested in show up in the screen.
Brendon sits there, fumbles for a moment till he gets his pants open and shifts enough so he can push them down far enough to get to his dick.
He mimics the strokes that Ryan used, all long and slow and he closes his eyes and edits out the other hand and in his minds eye Ryan is looking at him, smiling that secret, knowing smile all for him and he’s coming, breathing heavily.
He lets his hand linger there, and keeps his eyes closed, head tilted back and it’s uncomfortable enough to keep him from thinking too closely about the fact that he just came harder then he has in months all from watching Ryan jerk off onscreen to someone who isn’t him.
******************************************************************************
There’s five clips total, Brendon learns this after he spends almost two hours the next day searching for them. They’re all posted under different usernames, no tags or descriptions to speak of and he wonders how they stayed hidden for so long.
He has no clue how Ashlee found them in the first place or why she was even looking.
He bookmarks all of them and wishes his self-control was good enough that he could tell himself to not watch them and he wouldn’t.
As it is he decides to ration them out. One clip a night.
Any more then that and Spencer will start to ask questions, Brendon can’t answer those questions and if Spencer doesn’t know that Ryan made amateur homemade porn with someone who then posted them to the Internet… well Brendon isn’t going to be the one to tell him.
******************************************************************************
He watches the next one date wise, the one with Ryan jerking off had been the first posted and there were four others posted over the course of two months. The dates are such that they were touring when at least two of them were made and he can’t imagine how Ryan had snuck out long enough to make them.
The second one almost causes him to break his laptop, he’s expecting more jerking off, instead it starts in focus and perfectly lit and there’s no movement so he guesses the camera must be on some sort of tripod. Ryan is naked on the bed and the guy who was the camera guy in the first one, his voice is the same that’s how Brendon can tell, is climbing onto the bed with him equally nude.
They wrap around each other, and they’re kissing like they’ve done this before. Like they know each other and who the hell is this guy?
This is someone that Brendon has never seen before and he’s met or at least seen all of Ryan’s Vegas friends that aren’t them. He knows all their faces and this guys face is not familiar, this is someone that Ryan took pains to keep separate from them.
Keep secret from them.
The other guy is about the same age as Ryan, Brendon can see this when he turns as if to make sure the camera is still there before he refocuses on Ryan.
He settles between Ryan’s spread legs, and Brendon sees the lube lying next to Ryan’s hip before he picks it up.
He clenches his hands and he doesn’t need to see what’s going on, Ryan’s head tilts back and he pulls his knees up to his own chest, holding them in place while the other guy settles between Ryan’s drawn up knees like he belongs there.
Like that’s his space and he has every right to be in it.
His arm is moving and Brendon sees the motions but can’t seem to make his brain reconcile the fact that this guy has his fingers inside Ryan, is stretching him open and Ryan is moaning like a whore.
“Fuck, right there,” he moans and Brendon rubs himself through his jeans.
His eyes hurt from not blinking but god Ryan is gorgeous like this, all flushed and spread out and yeah, that’s some guy that’s not him but Ryan is beautiful enough that he can’t find it in himself to hate him too much (that’s a lie, a complete lie, but he’ll only admit it to himself when he’s not completely focused on watching Ryan take three fingers like they’re nothing from this guy and just hold himself open for more).
“Fuck, I’m ready,” Ryan groans, the guy bites his lip and kisses one of Ryan’s knees, the hand that isn’t busy stretching Ryan open reaches up and wraps loose around his cock.
“Yeah, you’re ready,” he says, he sounds like he’s smirking as he reaches on the other side of Ryan’s body. His hand comes back in view with a condom in it, and he rips it open, rolls it on. He looks smooth doing it, Brendon would be completely jealous of this guys moves if he wasn’t so sure that those moves were going to have him inside Ryan in a few seconds.
He stares at the screen as the guy grabs his dick and guides it into Ryan, Ryan’s head goes back eyes closing and the guy leans forward, hands wrapping around Ryan’s knees as he fucks him with long, even strokes.
Ryan moans, long and continuously, ‘oh god, right there, fuck, fuck’ interspersed between the moans every so often.
The guys’ eyes are closed as well and his head is leaning forward, chin almost to his chest and he’s not saying anything, just panting and groaning and…
Coming.
One of Ryan’s hands is between his legs, hand moving furiously on his cock.
He comes right after the guy does.
And the screen goes dark, the clip ending and Brendon swallows heavily.
He has his dick out and in hand before he even realizes that he moved and he’s staring at the blank screen not thinking about how easily Ryan took that guys’ fingers, how easily he took his cock.
How you didn’t come from being fucked unless you loved it, unless you’d done it more then just twice.
******************************************************************************
Spencer wants to have a barbecue. Just the four of them so they can have some time to reconnect.
“I don’t think…”
“We’re all supposed to be friends,” Spencer says. “We’ve told everyone that we’re all still friends so whatever your issues are with Ryan you need to get past them so people stop thinking that we kicked Ryan and Jon out or that Ryan and Jon left because they hate us.”
“Jon couldn’t hate us,” Brendon says.
“And neither can Ryan, the two of you need to work out whatever is going on with the two of you before we end up in some celebrity boxing match or something.”
Spencer glares at him for good measure and walks into the kitchen.
The thing is, Brendon doesn’t hate Ryan, he just… he hates that that Ryan wanted to do things musically that didn’t include him or Spencer and he hates that Ryan let some guy fuck him that wasn’t Brendon.
He could probably mention the one thing to Spencer, the other one would have Spencer keeling over and he’s already down to half a band, without Spencer he can’t carry the Panic name by himself.
******************************************************************************
The third clip starts with the camera being set on the tripod and tilted up. Ryan is naked and standing against a wall, the guy walks up to him and all Brendon hears is the kissing. The sounds of their lips moving against each other and Ryan’s moans.
The guy backs off and Brendon can see that he has a hand wrapped around Ryan’s dick, he goes to his knees and smirks up at him and Brendon can see Ryan roll his eyes.
The guy sucks the head of Ryan’s cock into his mouth and Ryan moans and a hand goes to the back of the guys head.
The guy pulls off and Ryan makes a noise of protest, eyes opening.
“What did we say?” the guy asks and Ryan rolls his eyes again and raises his arms above his head and out of view of the camera.
“Better,” he says, he runs his tongue up the length of Ryan’s cock and Ryan makes a noise, staring down at him.
“What you had in mind?” the guy asks, he has his hands wrapped around Ryan’s thighs, the tip of his tongue darts out to touch Ryan’s cock and he sucks the head into his mouth again for a second.
“There,” Ryan moans, eyes closing, head tilting back, “there were handcuffs.”
The guy looks up at him and he grins, “maybe next time,” he turns his head for a moment. “Besides that’s not really the bed for handcuffs.”
He turns his attention back to Ryan’s cock, sucking the head in again and then moving down slowly, back up again and down, every movement down taking a little bit more of Ryan’s dick into his mouth.
When he’s down all the way, Brendon can see the movement of his throat as he swallows and the expression on the guys’ face is blissful, it matches the expression on Ryan’s face.
They’re still for a moment and the guy backs off just a bit and Ryan’s hips move forward and then Ryan is fucking his face. His movements are erratic, his entire torso pulled taut from his arms over his head and Brendon doesn’t know how he’s doing it, keeping his hands and arms up but still managing to fuck the guys face with fast even strokes.
“Oh god, Jake, Jake,” the guy pulls off and his hands go to Ryan’s cock, stroking in time with Ryan’s movements and Ryan is coming on the guys face, long stripes of it on his cheek and mouth and neck.
Ryan is shuddering against the wall and the guy, Jake, is smiling, a real smile, not a smirk or a grin but a real true smile, up at him and Ryan slides to his knees and their arms go around each other and they’re kissing like…
Like this is maybe something more then sex and maybe something like Ryan had maybe had a boyfriend that he’d just never told them about.
******************************************************************************
This is so very NC-17 because apparently Ryan Ross porn star makes the sex happen.
Part 1 of 3.
RATING: NC-17
PAIRING: Ryan/OC, pre-Ryan/Brendon
AUTHOR: Melanie
SUMMARY: He doesn’t even want to know how Ashlee found it, he’s pretty sure it involves Pete in some way.
DISCLAIMER: I don’t own any of these boys and I’m pretty sure that this has never happened.
Speak To Me of Friends and Lovers 1/3
Ashlee is the one that sends him the link. Later he’ll think that he doesn’t even want to know how Ashlee found it, he’s pretty sure it involves Pete and he just can’t go there. For now there’s a ‘wtf’ comment in her e-mail and that alone is enough to force Brendon to watch it.
He clicks the play button and he has the sound turned off because he’s scared the dogs with some of the ones that Ash has a habit of forwarding to him.
He watches for a second, peering at the screen, the picture is sort of dark and out of focus, then suddenly bright and in focus, like whoever was operating the camera realized that they were operating the camera
It takes a moment of blinking at the screen, the camera-person is really focused on the guys dick and Brendon is really focused on it too; it’s a nice one. All long and thick and he’s half-wondering why Ashlee is forwarding him pornotube porn and half-wondering if he’s watching too much porn because the cock framed in the screen looks really familiar.
He’s just decided that there is no such thing as too much porn and the dick is just nice enough to be memorable when the camera jerks up to the face belonging to the really nice cock and Brendon clicks the pause button like he’s having a seizure.
Ryan’s face freezes there, Brendon blinks at the screen and he folds his hands together in his lap and doesn’t click the play button. Ryan’s looking directly at Brendon like he can see him through the laptop screen and time and knows that Brendon is thinking about watching porn starring Ryan Ross.
He doesn’t watch it, not right away anyway. He minimizes the screen and he goes to feed the dogs and wait for Spencer to come home.
He can’t watch porn with someone wearing Ryan’s face in it; it takes him the hour waiting for Spencer to convince himself of that.
This is just someone that looks like Ryan, because when would Ryan have had time to make porn with the touring and the recording of the first record and, it just wouldn’t have been physically possible.
The resolution to not watch Ryan Ross doppelganger porn lasts until he’s alone in his room.
Then he locks his door, something he doesn’t normally do unless he’s jerking off and he doesn’t bring the laptop onto the bed with him. Instead he sits in his desk chair, fully clothed and plugs his headphones in because the last thing he needs is for Spencer to hear him listening to the porn.
He maximizes the screen and it’s been long enough that the screen has reset, he clicks the play button and folds his hands together in his lap.
It starts the same, dark and out of focus, then suddenly there is light and the camera is focused and the dick is there again.
The camera makes the same jerky motion and he unlinks his hands long enough to turn the volume up.
“Come on then,” the camera man is saying, he sounds young and unfamiliar.
“You’re a dick,” and Brendon jerks, hands clenching tightly. It doesn’t mean anything that the look-alike Ryan sounds exactly like Ryan. It doesn’t, he might be mimicking him, except the monotone and low, bored voice is really hard to mimic.
“This was your idea, baby,” the camera man says, he sounds amused.
“This wasn’t quite what I had in mind,” the look-alike says, one of his hands moves into frame and strokes down his cock. Long fingers, long familiar fingers. Brendon has watched those fingers play guitars and pluck out simple songs on a piano.
That’s Ryan there, hand wrapping around his dick, not a look-alike or anyone else.
Just Ryan, jerking off for an unseen camera man and however many people had watched this on pornotube.
Brendon kind of wants to gouge all their eyes out. Nobody gets to see Ryan like this, Brendon doesn’t even get to see Ryan like this, all loose limbed, fingers wrapped around his cock…
He’s breathing heavy, just like Ryan on that bed that Brendon doesn’t recognize, the camera is completely focused on his cock and his hand and the sound of Ryan panting and moaning in his ears is almost more then he can take. He wants to touch himself, wants to stroke himself off like Ryan is, wants to…
Ryan’s back arches, the camera zooms out and moves and suddenly there’s another hand wrapping around Ryan’s as he comes, a long drawn out, “fuck” breathed out through bitten red lips.
Brendon snarls at the hand touching Ryan’s, when Ryan slumps, breathing shallowly his hand falls to his side.
The other hand, the interlopers hand trails through the splatter of come on Ryan’s belly.
The screen goes dark, the video ending and links to other, similar videos that he might be interested in show up in the screen.
Brendon sits there, fumbles for a moment till he gets his pants open and shifts enough so he can push them down far enough to get to his dick.
He mimics the strokes that Ryan used, all long and slow and he closes his eyes and edits out the other hand and in his minds eye Ryan is looking at him, smiling that secret, knowing smile all for him and he’s coming, breathing heavily.
He lets his hand linger there, and keeps his eyes closed, head tilted back and it’s uncomfortable enough to keep him from thinking too closely about the fact that he just came harder then he has in months all from watching Ryan jerk off onscreen to someone who isn’t him.
There’s five clips total, Brendon learns this after he spends almost two hours the next day searching for them. They’re all posted under different usernames, no tags or descriptions to speak of and he wonders how they stayed hidden for so long.
He has no clue how Ashlee found them in the first place or why she was even looking.
He bookmarks all of them and wishes his self-control was good enough that he could tell himself to not watch them and he wouldn’t.
As it is he decides to ration them out. One clip a night.
Any more then that and Spencer will start to ask questions, Brendon can’t answer those questions and if Spencer doesn’t know that Ryan made amateur homemade porn with someone who then posted them to the Internet… well Brendon isn’t going to be the one to tell him.
He watches the next one date wise, the one with Ryan jerking off had been the first posted and there were four others posted over the course of two months. The dates are such that they were touring when at least two of them were made and he can’t imagine how Ryan had snuck out long enough to make them.
The second one almost causes him to break his laptop, he’s expecting more jerking off, instead it starts in focus and perfectly lit and there’s no movement so he guesses the camera must be on some sort of tripod. Ryan is naked on the bed and the guy who was the camera guy in the first one, his voice is the same that’s how Brendon can tell, is climbing onto the bed with him equally nude.
They wrap around each other, and they’re kissing like they’ve done this before. Like they know each other and who the hell is this guy?
This is someone that Brendon has never seen before and he’s met or at least seen all of Ryan’s Vegas friends that aren’t them. He knows all their faces and this guys face is not familiar, this is someone that Ryan took pains to keep separate from them.
Keep secret from them.
The other guy is about the same age as Ryan, Brendon can see this when he turns as if to make sure the camera is still there before he refocuses on Ryan.
He settles between Ryan’s spread legs, and Brendon sees the lube lying next to Ryan’s hip before he picks it up.
He clenches his hands and he doesn’t need to see what’s going on, Ryan’s head tilts back and he pulls his knees up to his own chest, holding them in place while the other guy settles between Ryan’s drawn up knees like he belongs there.
Like that’s his space and he has every right to be in it.
His arm is moving and Brendon sees the motions but can’t seem to make his brain reconcile the fact that this guy has his fingers inside Ryan, is stretching him open and Ryan is moaning like a whore.
“Fuck, right there,” he moans and Brendon rubs himself through his jeans.
His eyes hurt from not blinking but god Ryan is gorgeous like this, all flushed and spread out and yeah, that’s some guy that’s not him but Ryan is beautiful enough that he can’t find it in himself to hate him too much (that’s a lie, a complete lie, but he’ll only admit it to himself when he’s not completely focused on watching Ryan take three fingers like they’re nothing from this guy and just hold himself open for more).
“Fuck, I’m ready,” Ryan groans, the guy bites his lip and kisses one of Ryan’s knees, the hand that isn’t busy stretching Ryan open reaches up and wraps loose around his cock.
“Yeah, you’re ready,” he says, he sounds like he’s smirking as he reaches on the other side of Ryan’s body. His hand comes back in view with a condom in it, and he rips it open, rolls it on. He looks smooth doing it, Brendon would be completely jealous of this guys moves if he wasn’t so sure that those moves were going to have him inside Ryan in a few seconds.
He stares at the screen as the guy grabs his dick and guides it into Ryan, Ryan’s head goes back eyes closing and the guy leans forward, hands wrapping around Ryan’s knees as he fucks him with long, even strokes.
Ryan moans, long and continuously, ‘oh god, right there, fuck, fuck’ interspersed between the moans every so often.
The guys’ eyes are closed as well and his head is leaning forward, chin almost to his chest and he’s not saying anything, just panting and groaning and…
Coming.
One of Ryan’s hands is between his legs, hand moving furiously on his cock.
He comes right after the guy does.
And the screen goes dark, the clip ending and Brendon swallows heavily.
He has his dick out and in hand before he even realizes that he moved and he’s staring at the blank screen not thinking about how easily Ryan took that guys’ fingers, how easily he took his cock.
How you didn’t come from being fucked unless you loved it, unless you’d done it more then just twice.
Spencer wants to have a barbecue. Just the four of them so they can have some time to reconnect.
“I don’t think…”
“We’re all supposed to be friends,” Spencer says. “We’ve told everyone that we’re all still friends so whatever your issues are with Ryan you need to get past them so people stop thinking that we kicked Ryan and Jon out or that Ryan and Jon left because they hate us.”
“Jon couldn’t hate us,” Brendon says.
“And neither can Ryan, the two of you need to work out whatever is going on with the two of you before we end up in some celebrity boxing match or something.”
Spencer glares at him for good measure and walks into the kitchen.
The thing is, Brendon doesn’t hate Ryan, he just… he hates that that Ryan wanted to do things musically that didn’t include him or Spencer and he hates that Ryan let some guy fuck him that wasn’t Brendon.
He could probably mention the one thing to Spencer, the other one would have Spencer keeling over and he’s already down to half a band, without Spencer he can’t carry the Panic name by himself.
The third clip starts with the camera being set on the tripod and tilted up. Ryan is naked and standing against a wall, the guy walks up to him and all Brendon hears is the kissing. The sounds of their lips moving against each other and Ryan’s moans.
The guy backs off and Brendon can see that he has a hand wrapped around Ryan’s dick, he goes to his knees and smirks up at him and Brendon can see Ryan roll his eyes.
The guy sucks the head of Ryan’s cock into his mouth and Ryan moans and a hand goes to the back of the guys head.
The guy pulls off and Ryan makes a noise of protest, eyes opening.
“What did we say?” the guy asks and Ryan rolls his eyes again and raises his arms above his head and out of view of the camera.
“Better,” he says, he runs his tongue up the length of Ryan’s cock and Ryan makes a noise, staring down at him.
“What you had in mind?” the guy asks, he has his hands wrapped around Ryan’s thighs, the tip of his tongue darts out to touch Ryan’s cock and he sucks the head into his mouth again for a second.
“There,” Ryan moans, eyes closing, head tilting back, “there were handcuffs.”
The guy looks up at him and he grins, “maybe next time,” he turns his head for a moment. “Besides that’s not really the bed for handcuffs.”
He turns his attention back to Ryan’s cock, sucking the head in again and then moving down slowly, back up again and down, every movement down taking a little bit more of Ryan’s dick into his mouth.
When he’s down all the way, Brendon can see the movement of his throat as he swallows and the expression on the guys’ face is blissful, it matches the expression on Ryan’s face.
They’re still for a moment and the guy backs off just a bit and Ryan’s hips move forward and then Ryan is fucking his face. His movements are erratic, his entire torso pulled taut from his arms over his head and Brendon doesn’t know how he’s doing it, keeping his hands and arms up but still managing to fuck the guys face with fast even strokes.
“Oh god, Jake, Jake,” the guy pulls off and his hands go to Ryan’s cock, stroking in time with Ryan’s movements and Ryan is coming on the guys face, long stripes of it on his cheek and mouth and neck.
Ryan is shuddering against the wall and the guy, Jake, is smiling, a real smile, not a smirk or a grin but a real true smile, up at him and Ryan slides to his knees and their arms go around each other and they’re kissing like…
Like this is maybe something more then sex and maybe something like Ryan had maybe had a boyfriend that he’d just never told them about.